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10:59 a.m. - 2002-08-29
Slightly Less Whacked Things are doing slightly better. I�m finally getting a little support here�But please Let me share a lessoned learned here.. If by chance you have a friend in the same sort of situation at some point�. DO NOT for any reason chastise him. He is going through a lot. He might not be acting / reacting rationally but he needs you� he needs you to be 100% there for him. Do not bother with what he may or may not have going for him� that is of no consequence to him� there is no way he can see what he might have, he�s going to fixate on what he�s lost. This is what needs to happen. Also do not assume there are those closer who will be there for him and able to do more for him. Those closer may just be incapable of helping or helping enough. You�re friend is in pain, he needs you to be there for him. I know my reaction seemed extreme to people. I know people thought it shouldn�t be that hard� I have soo much going for me� Well for the last few days none of it mattered. All that mattered was what I lost and no one around here was helping. And when I cried out for help / explained how I felt I was chastened.. �You have this, you have that you shouldn�t feel ______ .� Well I�m sorry all I could see was that I lost the second person to ever call me their best friend. And why� why did I do it� Cause I was hurting my loved ones� the very same people who then abandoned me� Well I tell you what� these next few weeks are going to be very defining for me� Those who wholeheartedly come to my aide and support me through this� will be vastly awarded. Those who don�t, risk losing me. There is no way I can justify cutting off Purple for being a bad friend and not apply the same standards across the board� And as a retort to those who have said or thought �Damn Fritz you have more than most ever know� just get over this. You�re not that deserving of sympathy� Well� go to hell please. I mean yeah, I know I�m the luckiest guy in the world. I know I�m nowhere even close to worthy of the life I get to live� Heh� Jesus doesn�t deserve the life I live. I�m beyond lucky� I know. But that doesn�t mean I don�t get hurt, that I don�t have issues or am any less of a needy friend. Like I started saying� I am doing slightly better� which is much more of a step then it seems. This is the first day that I�m not doing worse then the day before. Plus tomorrow�s my Friday off and my weekend starts. I have done a little retreating into the garage and that�s a good thing. I�ve made pretty decent process there� I�m fixing up my saw and doing some more organization. Hopefully I�ll get to the point where I�ll be able to do the rest of the chair work here and not have to utilize my Dad�s shop. And you guys� you guys have rocked so hard! Nicole, mystical, Pam, Batten & Marla you all have left me the sweetest caring note. I can�t thank you all enough. I just wish you all could be here. Take Care all -Fritz Fritz�s quote of the day : �There I was, cut wide open on the operating table� and instead of you all coming up and putting me back together� you came up and unloaded salt, vinegar & OldBay like I was some sort of French fry� It�s been cool - 2005-05-18 If you happen to have a surplus of funds, please feel free to buy something for little old me off my Wish list. You will earn my undying love and gratitude. ;) |
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